The Week in Review

"There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past." - George Carlin

Just a reminder, Iggy announced a second WPBT WSoP Satellite for the $1500 NL event, which will take place on June 3rd at the Rio in Las Vegas. Here's another chance at getting in a lot cheaper.

What: No Limit Satellite for the $1500 WSoP Event
When: Sunday May 1st
Time: 7pm EST
Where: Poker Stars
Buy in: $30 + $3
Restrictions: Bloggers only
Password: Same as last week (E-mail Iggy or me for specifics)
Attire: Uber-casual with pants optional

Participants will not be awarded points towards the WPBT Leaderboard. As you know this will be held the day before the WPBT event at the Aladdin. We have one qualifier already... Bob. Who is going to be next?

Oh, and I will be running a Hilton Sisters Challenge for this event. The winner gets kicked in the junk by Bob.

Monday: I forgot it was still the Passover holiday in New York City when I wandered over to my favorite bagel store first thing in the morning for a fresh Everything bagel and the damn store was closed. I'm McCatholic, what do you want me to do? That awful session of Razz at the Blue Parrot put me in foul mood and set the tone for most of the week. I got caught up in a funk and it took me a few days to pull out of it. At least everyone had a good laugh out of my write up.

Tuesday: A Rod hit 3 home runs and set the record for most RBIs as a Yankee in Yankee Stadium with 10. Man, he was locked in. I had an A Rod moment myself at the tables trying to clear my reload bonus on Party Poker. I won 35 BB in two quick hit and run sessions lasting no more than an hour of total playing time. I doubled up my buy in at one table within two orbits, so I left.

Poker Playing Music on Tuesday...
1. Phil Lesh and Friends
2. Medeski, Martin, and Wood with John Scofield
3. Radiohead
4. Charlie Hunter with Stanton Moore
5. John Coltrane

Wednesday: I ended a four day winning streak when I posted my first losing session in a while on Party Poker. KK was cracked by A7 and AQ lost in a huge pot to AT. I spent most of the day in a weird funk after I got into a rare fight with Briana. I won't go into specifics, but that hellcat drives me crazy somedays. Luckily AlCantHang called me late in the afternoon for a Dial-a-Shot from Key West. That put me in a much better mood. Al rules.

Thursday: I woke up focused and in a better mood after I stayed up until 5am writing. I completed several freelance articles and set my work schedule for May. I have 11 articles due before I move to Vegas and I already cranked one out. I continued my quest to work off my Party Poker bonus. I dropped an entire buy in at a $3/6 table in less than an hour due to a few bad beats and missed draws.

And Yes, I know all about Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise's jaunt to Rome. Some of you know that I'm a sucker for all things Katie Holmes. I watch Dawson's Creek or fuck's sake. Normally, news of my favorite actress getting boinked by Tom "Cocktails and Dreams" Cruise is enough to set me on tilt... but not yesterday. In some freak miracle, my month of April internet crush, Raymi, stopped by my blog(s) and acknowledged the fact that I was getting a little frustrated because she had not posted naked pictures of herself on her blog in a very long time. "Patience," she wrote me in my comments.

I checked to make sure it was her and not one of my friends with a twisted sense of humor. I'm glad she said something to me before the month is over. In March I was cyber stalking this Swedish lesbian I stumbled upon who constantly posted pictures of herself kissing random girls she'd meet in clubs and at the supermarket. Katie, who?

Late night, Bad Blood pinged me an IM and told me that F Train made the final four of a WSoP Razz satellite for the $2k event on Full Tilt. I was 40 hands away from clearing my bonus when I logged off of Party and hit the rail with Bad Blood and Glyph. F Train was the chip leader until I showed up. I guess you can call me "the cooler" because he went from first to last. He even made a comment that he didn't start catching bricks until I showed up.

Seriously, F Train is a sadist. Insane. I could never put myself through that type of torture. Oh wait, I've walked down that road to insanity before, after all I did date a neurotic valium-popping actress once. Talk about getting kicked in the junk on a daily basis.

When it was three handed, F Train had his last 8k in front of him. With $500 antes and the blinds at 4k/8k, he made a heroic stand and survived a big hand to double up. F Train then went heads up for the WSoP seat. He was outchipped 4 to 1 and kept catching bring ins or bricks on fourth street. With A-6/J he moved all in and survived with 3-7-K/4! Then he had 6-3/A-5-Q and moved all-in. He couldn't hit a low card and ended up with running queens to spell his doom. He took home $140 for second place. Next time.

It's Friday

I expect to clear my Party Poker bonus by later today. I want to play in a few tournaments this weekend. I haven't played too many recently and axed SNGs from my daily poker diet since my awful streak in February. On Saturday I'll be taping the next episode of Lord Admiral Card Club and be working on some more freelance articles. I will atempt to read every blog on my blog roll this weekend. Briana leaves for Europe on Monday morning, so I expect I'll spend some time with her on Sunday after the WPBT WSoP Satellite. Don't forget that NBC is broadcasting their first episode of the National Heads Up Championship on Sunday at noon. Check your local listings.

And now scenes from next week's Tao of Poker...

Monday: WPBT WSoP #2 write up
Tuesday: Existentialist Conversations with Strippers, Part 3
Wednesday: Hump Day Pimp Day (featuring The Poker Geek)
Thursday: Monthly Review: April 2005
Friday: Reader Mail

One week from today, I'll be taking a three or four day hiatus from blogging and heading into Indiana to hang out with everyone's favorite donkey fucker... Daddy from Snailtrax. We're gonna roadtrip from Southern Indiana to Cincinnati to see a Trey Anastasio Band concert and catch a Reds game. The next day we're gonna pay homage to the Blogfather and get shitfaced in his hometown. We expect Iggy to be participating in the festivities which might include a scintilla of poker. Stay tuned for more details in the meantime, I have to go write. Have a groovy weekend everyone. Maybe I'll see you at the tables.

Editor's Note: Happy birthday, Maudie!!!